Transformers: The Last Knight (0/2 Hats)

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Austinn Kept His Hat ON

‘Transformers: The Last Knight’: The Rude Awakening of Optimus Prime. conclusion: 2/10 (kept my hat on). “So welcome one and all to the world premiere of corporate crap fest” -Michael Scott. This movie takes every terrible decision you could possibly make when creating an action movie, and rolls it into one two-and-a-half-hour train wreck. While the CGI was fairly good, the action was just mindless explosions and noise. Most of the battles were barely comprehensible, the human characters were worthless, and the entire plot was just so inconceivably stupid! There were so many attempts at humor that were just cringe-worthy and idiotic, and basically all of the dialogue was crap, like they didn’t even try. Both the acting and voice acting were bland at best. I couldn’t wait for it to end. I see these movies, so that you don’t have to. #soundslikesomethingMerlinwoulddo #aknighttoforget #subplot #primetime #BayisCray

Kelvin Kept His Hat ON

“Transformers: The Last Knight: Marky Mark and the Junky Bunch.” Conclusion: 0.5/10. This was truly one of the most insanely idiotic movies I have ever seen. I have trouble comprehending how any functioning adults participated in the production of this movie. Much like projectile vomiting, the plot is all over the place and a total mess. Almost nothing about what was happening made sense. Somehow, it wasn’t even the worst aspect about the movie. The dialogue was totally inane and all attempts at humor played about as well as one of those comedians who gets buzzed out on America’s Got Talent. Mark Wahlberg has been on my ‘ish list for a while now and this movie does nothing to help his case. His performance was annoying, vapid, and lacked any resemblance of actual human behavior and emotion. I am not even exaggerating at how bad this movie is, it really freaking sucks. Michael Bay has some talent as a director strictly when it comes to action sequences, but all the crap he brings along with it is a high price to pay. I could not recommend not seeing a movie more than I do for this. #IHaveAQuintessa #CadeAndAbet #ThatSoundsLikeSomethingMerlinWouldSay #AKnightToForget #LetItBee #MichaelBayOfPigs #Comerroro #PutTheChrysBackInChrysler #JunkYardDogs

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